Are you being bullied? It’s extremely tough, but remember – you are not alone.
The Mind Of A Bully
Ninety-nine percent of the time, bullies choose their victims based on what they don’t have (see also “How To Overcome Bullying + Helps Younger Victims“).
Understanding that you are the target because you have something which the bully does not, is super important. Bullies are intimidated by their victims, hence why they feel the need to bring you down.
Don’t give the bully a reaction, because they love to feed off your response, and crave the attention. By not reacting, they will eventually get bored.
If they don’t, then they are going to come across as very strange, because why are they obsessing over you?
Why Is It Essential To Tell Your Parents You’re Being Bullied?
The first piece of advice we are always given on the topic of bullying is that it’s important to tell your parent or guardian if you are being bullied.
Although, telling them is not as simple as it sounds. It can be overwhelming opening up about what is happening to us.
Despite that, here are reasons why telling your parents will positively affect you.
- Telling your parent or guardian that you’re being bullied might not necessarily mean the bullying will stop, but the weight will be lifted off your shoulders, as you will no longer be on your own carrying the pain.
- By speaking to a parent or guardian, you are creating an ally for yourself; someone you can vent to.
- They can help you keep track of what’s going on, which will make actioning the bullying easier.
- They can help you realize that you do not deserve to be bullied; helping you know your worth.
- Silence is a bully’s best friend, by not staying silent you are on the path to beating your bully.
4 Methods Of Telling Your Parents You’re Being Bullied
Coming to the realization that it is time to tell your parent or guardian about what is happening to you can be daunting.
The important thing is that you find a way to tell them which feels the most comfortable for you.
Choose a quiet time when you know your parents won’t be distracted and will be able to give you their full attention. Early Monday morning whilst they’re rushing to work, may not be your best bet.
Perhaps Sunday lunchtime, when things are more settled might work better. But, this is entirely up to you and what suits your parent or guardians’ lifestyle.
Let’s run through some of your options, weighing up the pros and cons so that you can choose which method best suits you.
Front-facing may feel like the scariest approach, but it has its perks. Once you’ve said it, it’s done, it’s out in the open.
All the awkwardness of standing face-to-face with your parent or guardian for the first time with them knowing what has been happening to you will be finished within seconds.
On top of that, telling them face-to-face allows the opportunity for a discussion on how you are going to move forward from here.
You are likely to leave this conversation feeling lighter and on the path to a solution.
In A Voice Note
If it is the thought of looking your parent or guardian directly in the eye that makes you anxious, then perhaps sending them on voice message via Whatsapp, Facebook messenger, or text message might be a pleasant way for you to tell them.
This method allows you to speak your mind out loud, you may find it easier to explain what has been happening to you if you speak the words out loud.
By taking away the face-to-face element you may find it easier. Your parent will be able to respond with their advice in a voice message back to you.
If you’re worried about them coming and finding you in person to discuss things and want to keep the conversation to voice messages, then express this to them in your original voice message.
Although, you may find once you have told them via voice message, that it will feel more transparent to speak to them face-to-face.
In A Letter
Perhaps it is the speaking out-loud part of telling your parents that unnerves you. Some of us best communicate through written language as opposed to verbal language.
If you feel that this is you, then writing a well-thought-out letter may be your best method of communicating with your parent or guardian that you are being bullied.
This method gives you the capacity to not miss out on any key information. You can take your time to construct this letter so that it contains everything you wish your parent or guardian to know.
And you can ask questions within the letter, that you wish answered by your parent or guardian.
Over and above that, by writing down your thoughts and feelings you may find that a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.
Writing can be extremely therapeutic, therefore it may take some of your hardship away.
On A Text Message
Without a doubt, this may seem like the simplest way to tell your parent or guardian that you are being bullied.
If the above three options still look overwhelming for you, then simply sending a text message stating that you are being bullied and need some help, might be your greatest option.
You can tell them at the click of a button. Just press send and your worries will be shared. Remember – a problem shared is a problem halved.
What To Say
- Before you go and blurt out all of the information, have a plan of what needs to be said, whether that be in writing or vocalized. Creating a plan will ensure you communicate everything that needs to be said.
- Start in chronological order. From events A – Z. This will give them a better understanding of what has been happening and why.
- Start the conversation or written language with, “There is something important I need to speak to you about.” Trust me, this will grab their attention.
- Communicate that you are seeking their advice and empathy,
- It can be extremely personal being bullied, and you may not be ready to share all of the details just yet. If this is the case then communicate this to your parent.
- Together, decide on actions that you can take together to make things better. Leaving the conversation with a plan of action will help when moving forward.
It can be scary opening up about being bullied – but you will feel so much better for sharing your burden with a parent or guardian.
Things will only improve from the moment you tell your parent or guardian what has been happening to you. So, best of luck, and don’t let any bully get you down!
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